Speed Eagle TECHNOLOGY SPECIAL

Reports are in fresh from popular blogging site Facebook that Commordor Amiga is due for a comeback - this time in the modern guise of a mobile telephone.
The technology giants of the 1990s are returning riding a wave of 90s nostalgia that is bringing back everything from Hammer Pants to plaid shirts. Now the kids want to talk on their Amigas.


The APhone shares many features in common with rivals, the iPhones. In addition it has RF Out, Audio In and Video Out ports.

Talcum Powder

Not since I was a baby have I had the pleasure of using talc. I recently bought a pair of shoes that allow me to roam sockless and so I have purchased some talcum powder to keep my feet dry and comfortable. It’s an incredible material. I advise the generous use of it in all footware.

10:14am

Speed Eagle 2: Great recent Speed Eagle articles. I love the robotic arm photo. Excellent. Sorry i've been so slack....i'll do more...

10:14am

Speed Eagle 1: I've been kind of slack too. You have to, you know, be struck by inspiration.

10:15am

Speed Eagle 2: You speak the truth.

10:16am

Speed Eagle 1: I am just working on some amazing music, would you like to hear it?

10:16am

Speed Eagle 2: Sure. Lyrics and tune? Or are you just putting pen to paper?

10:16am

Speed Eagle 1: I will play it for you right now. It has amazing words, it is all recorded.

10:19am

Speed Eagle 2: What are you saying in the track - what the eyes?

10:20am

Speed Eagle 1: Close them. Every night. It's important to do that.

10:20am

Speed Eagle 2: Every night....close your eyes. It’s good. Educational.

10:20am

Speed Eagle 1: Thank you Sir.

10:21am

Speed Eagle 2: I like the tune...and the high guitar.

10:21am

Speed Eagle 1: Yes, it's going to be a very big hit I think.

10:21am

Speed Eagle 2: Could be a soundtrack to a 1980's-set Brett Easton Ellis film-of-a-book soundtrack.

10:21am

Speed Eagle 1: It's like one of those records where you turn the page when it dings, that's what you mean to say.

10:22am

Speed Eagle 2: Yes, thats what i mean. Thanks for straightening me out.

10:24am

Speed Eagle 2: So is that the chorus?

10:24am

Speed Eagle 1: I haven't put the dings in yet, but you should turn the page at the chorus probably.

10:25am

Speed Eagle 2: Will you do a sort of monologue at the beginning..."kids....when you hear this sound....DING.......turn the PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE...."

10:25am

Speed Eagle 1: That's a very good idea.

10:25am

Speed Eagle 2: It might not work, but there is something in there.

10:25am

Speed Eagle 1: There is something. Perhaps a Speed Eagle article?

10:26am

Speed Eagle 2: I had a Star Wars record like that. R2D2 was the sound to know to turn the page.

10:26am

Speed Eagle 1: That's a good indicator.

10:26am

Speed Eagle 2: He's perfect for that sort of task.

10:26am

Speed Eagle 1: Perhaps you could sort of talk about the finger pointing at the moon, and the moon in that context except R2D2 is a finger and the moon is the next page.

10:26am

Speed Eagle 2: Yes. Reminds me of that thing sailors used to do, something like when the sun is setting, if you lay your finger out against the horizon line and the sun is on the edge of the finger then you have about ten minutes to sunset...or something like that.

10:28am

Speed Eagle 1: Holy moly

10:28am

Speed Eagle 2: Maybe an article about the usefulness of fingers/pointing....a sort of counter argument to selling your fingers for weed?

10:28am

Speed Eagle 1: The world before casio eh. Oh yes that is good.

10:29am

Speed Eagle 2: I think i'll try and right something about pointing. Actually no, i'll write something, and right it at the same time.

10:29am

Speed Eagle 1: You can't do that sun trick with a laser beam. You're screwed.

10:29am

Speed Eagle 2: Can't be done.

10:29am

Speed Eagle 1: Lost at sea.

10:30am

Speed Eagle 2: Blindness is also something you'd need to look out for.

10:30am

Speed Eagle 1: Why's that?

10:30am

Speed Eagle 2: Staring at the sun.

10:30am

Speed Eagle 1: Oh absolutely.

10:30am

Speed Eagle 2: Be sure to look only at the finger (middle distance staring?). Haven’t we written something about focussing on the middle ground previously?

10:30am

Speed Eagle 1: Let's just publish this chat history eh?

10:30am

Speed Eagle 2: Yeah that’s easier.

10:31am

Speed Eagle 1: Let the readers sort it out. I mean, it's all there.

10:31am

Speed Eagle 2: Good idea.

10:31am

Speed Eagle 1: It's kind of a mind map. It probably does need some sub-editing, but in this day of digital media those sort of expenses have been cut.

10:32am

Speed Eagle 2: Editorial power should be wielded. In an economically viable and sustainable way.

10:32am

Speed Eagle 1: It should.

10:32am

Speed Eagle 2: Goes without saying.

2000

Throughout the late twentieth century, professional semioticians struggle with the problem of constructing an iconographic language capable of communicating radiation dangers long after the death of current languages. Several of these symbolic systems are prepared for nuclear facilities, including the US government nuclear waste storage facility at Yucca Mountain, Nevada

this is from here it's quite interesting

Speed Eagle Marijuana Remix

Speed Eagle recommends the following choice of action.
That is to sell all of your internal organs and body parts as soon as possible as a method of obtaining hard currency for the procurement of the drug Marijuana.
The body parts can and will be replaced with synthetic mechanised replacements (SMR's)
Do not be immediately alarmed by the prospect of loosing (sic) vital aspects of your human-ity in this important process, for these organs and limbs as well as the SMR replacements are merely matter. They do not contain real meaning, logic, reason, the mind, the brain, the higher cognitive functions.
They are mere adornments.
They are mere additions to the human form and as such their obstruction of your goal cannot be justified by any logical means.

Notabulous Benedictine: This article is a golden oldie originally published in the Movable Type eara of Speed Eagles 'penny dreadful' pulp days. It has been since been remixed and cybernetically enhanced with a 'photograph', which means light picture; a promising new medium that may don the mantle of Visual Art one day.

TCP/IP Meat & gristle network problems.

My nose is running, a bit. If I were to somehow want to get my mind/body to clean up this mess, who would I email?
Is it nose@head.tim? Do I have my own top level domain? Am I master of my dominion or an island in the stream?
Perhaps it would be better to try nose@head.tim.com. You can have emails at subdomains can't you? How do I validate my internal networking? Don't tell me I have to use numbers like 128.1.1.1. The world has moved on from that. I have a feeling I somehow need to just direct this all at localhost ... where does the @ go?
How does robocop deal with this? Is that what all the numbers and stuff in his Heads Up Display are about?
Who would win out of Robocop or Terminator?
All bets are on the Terminator - he is way lethal. But Robocop has empathy and heart. And he can take a hell of a beating. But so can Terminator.
Especially the molten metal one. He could turn into the cop from T2 and it's cop vs cop ... a psychological thriller.
If the Terminator has a problem with any of his fleshy protuberences he just burns it off.

Speed eagle pony tail special

Recently one among our number had the incident of having a man's pony tail go into her mouth. This incident was very closely followed by a sudden and negligible illness leaving her feeling peakish and dreadful.
"The hair kind of brushed into my mouth", she recanted recently. "It wasn't like a pony tail going into my mouth" she piped up, miming.

"He was dancing, so it was swinging".

Cause and causality are two related yet equally important topics that we here at Speed Eagle hold dear, as they are the very mortar that stops the bricks of western thought from sliding off each other, and with them the highly rickety ediface of enlightenment kultur.
In order to plot the dimensions of these claims we have outputted this informative info-grafik. The results are therefore right in front of your face, and all further conversation is as a result: impotent and hollow.